I have a problem with the word “blog.” No, really. I don’t mind “website”, “web page” or “webspace.” On a particularly delightful day, I might even be hand-wavy at “weblog.” But the word “blog” is a downright irritant and has the unfailing effect of bringing out a wince on my face.
What the hell kind of a person calls a weblog a blog? What the hell kind of a word is it anyway? Frankly, it sounds as if a set of jovial air molecules bounced off the diaphragm, all excited about tunneling through space, made their way to the larynx in unquestionable earnestness, well motivated to script a masterpiece in the oral cavity, and then, suddenly, for no good reason, got all muddle-headed, chickened out, and ran off the nearest bodily orifice that they could aim at–producing in sum total what I can only describe as a greasy half-choke from a wet, clogged and dingy windpipe.
Surely, there is only one other word that is even more irksome.
If the appalling insult from “blog” wasn’t quite enough, someone who was smoking some serious pot must have come up with “bllll-ogg-O-sss-pee-errr.” Don’t even get me started on that. Every time I think of it, I am overpowered with a blistering cavalcade of emotions that it tires me physically to even try and condemn it. I spend all my energy trying to choose which ridicule to throw at it that all I can finally do is grit my teeth, sigh heavily, roll my eyes (strictly in that order) and then, slowly, gently, smilingly, try and think of a particularly delightful day.